What is Vulva Massage & Why It's a Must-Try? (NSFW)

You can probably tell that, here at GetLusty, we love vulvas. That's why we want to dive into vulva massages! But what is a vulva massage? Tantra education, Devi Ward, is here to answer that question, plus why we ladies should massage our vulvas every day!

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Vulva massage, what is it?

Pussy massage, or as I like to affectionately say “vulva massage” just happens to be my favorite kind of massage, and the only sort of massage that I will indulge in on an almost daily basis.

Aside from just feeling really good, there are wondrous arrays of emotional and physiological benefits associated with a good old-fashioned vulva massage. What is a vulva you might ask? Check out Vulva 101 for more information!

3 reasons vulva massages are good for you


#1 It's healthy

It is emotionally and psychologically healing for women to feel comfortable enough with their bodies to enjoy touching their genitals in both a sexual and non-sexual way.

Back when we were little toddlers, before our sex-negative cultural conditioning was firmly established in our psyches, we touched our vulvas with blissful abandon. Completely free of any sense of guilt, shame, or even self-consciousness, we enjoyed the innocent exploration of our bodies, especially this mysterious area that felt so nice to hold and handle.

By massaging our vulvas on a regular basis, we not only inform our intellectual minds that this is happy & healthy thing to do, but we also inform our emotional body that this is an acceptable activity, thereby healing some of that painful misinformation we received as children so long ago.

#2 It heals

Regular full body massage is known to have physically healing, regenerative and even therapeutic effects on the cellular tissue of the body. If we are stressed out and tense, physical massage is usually a great way to relax the muscles and heal that stress related tension. Massage also acts to increase blood flow and circulation in the tissue being massaged, as well as help with stimulating the lymphatic system to support it’s work in carrying toxins out of the body. If massage works to do all of these things to other areas of your body, imagine what it can do for your genitals!

#3 It's highly sensual

Recent studies have shown that women have as much erectile tissue in our “sexual pleasure organs” as a man has in his penis. And, it can take as much as 20-45 minutes before all of that erectile tissue is fully engorged and ready for action. Vulva massage helps with a woman’s ability to fully respond to sexual stimulation by ensuring that all of her “pleasure centers” are primed and pumped!

I find it so very interesting that the primary function of “female viagra” is to increase blood flow and circulation in the sexual organs so that a woman can feel more sexual pleasure and sensation. I have had many female students report an increase in libido and sexual pleasure when they began to actively give themselves vulva massage in both a sexual and non-sexual manner.

With all of those amazing benefits, you would think that women would be having vulva massages on regular basis!

Devi Ward is an International Authentic Tantra Educator & Sensual Empowerment Coach. Devi has been on a path of Erotic Awakening and Spiritual Embodiment since 1993, studying meditation, holistic healing arts, and alternative forms of erotic expression. Devi has been a Professional Sensual Movement Artist since 1992.

Devi is the Founder of Feminine Emergence and creator of Sacred Erotic Dance™; a Movement-Healing modality that uses The 5 Core Pelvic Movements™, Authentic Tantra™ & Sensual Dance, to produce physical, emotional and spiritual healing in our relationship to sexual and sensual self-expression.

Her first book “Shake Your Soul Song! A Woman’s Guide To Self-Empowerment Through The Art of Self-Pleasure” is scheduled for release in October 2012. Follow Devi on Twitter @deviwardtantra and on Facebook.

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Labiaplasty & Porn: What Can We Learn? (Pt 2)

Who doesn't love a beautiful vulva? Why isn't every vulva beautiful? This Naked November, we're thinking about nudity and body image. We think you should be naked more often. In fact, we have ways to help you feel better about your naked body. Sometimes, though, as humans, we compare ourselves to others. This could give us a complex! In the discussion of body image, we're talking about the plastic surgery called labiaplasty. We continue Hylton Coxwell's of Vulva 101's discussion about porn's affect on women's genitals. Here, Hylton jumps into the specifics of his argument.

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First, a word on pubes

Contrary to popular belief, removing pubic hair is not a new thing. We humans have been doing it for at least 5,000 years, and probably considerably longer, for both aesthetic and practical reasons. So why do we start seeing shaved vulva appearing in porn in the mid- to late-1980s?

That’s actually a trick question. Though the 1980s are often cited as the start of the shaved vulva trend, that’s not when we see the first smooth vulva on-screen. Scroll back to 1972, the movie Deep Throat sports Linda Lovelace’s fully shaved vulva. Thanks to Fanpix for the picture. When asked in an interview with Esquire Magazine why she shaved for the film, Linda replied, “I always do. I like it.”

And today, women (and men) answer that question the same way. They remove their pubic hair because they want to, they like it and because they can. Of course, there were porn movies before the 1970s, but by today’s standards they were very difficult to produce, acquire and view, ergo they only had very limited audiences.

In these ‘stag films’ we still find the occasional shaved vulva, even in very early black and white films (silent but with big band soundtracks). Personally, jazz and swing are a little off-putting in terms of porn music, but I grew up in the age of “bow chicka wow-wow” themes, so I can’t be one to judge. Either way, it’s another example of how porn is a reflection of society.

Shaved vulva on film can be traced back to somewhere between 1915 and 1920, coincidentally the same time we start seeing shaved armpits in Hollywood movies. Prior to that we run out of film pretty rapidly, but we have literary evidence, artwork and the existence of the pubic wig, or ‘merkin’ (dating back to the mid-1400s) to show us people have been removing pubic for a very long time.

Clearly, porn isn’t causing people to shave, wax, laser or trim. People shaving, waxing, lasering and trimming are what’s causing hair-free vulva in porn, not the other way around.

The unnatural vulva

What about vulva themselves, does porn on film/video show “unnatural” or “impossibly neat” ones? Many claim the vulva seen in porn don’t appear in nature and seeing these unnatural vulva causes women to feel bad about theirs and incites them to have labiaplasty surgery. That’s simply not true and it’s one of the most mind-numbingly stupid things I’ve ever heard.

We already established in Part 1 the vulva shown in photographic porn are indeed real and actually vulva. No impossibly perfect—I think they’re all possibly perfect—nor surgically altered, dyed or Photoshopped vulva anywhere to be found (except when required by law). Video, of course, shows the same real vulva. With one caveat: there’s surprisingly very little visible vulva on video (say that three times fast!).


The hidden vulva

Even in big-budget, two-hour features there can be less than five minutes of footage in which you can clearly see a vulva. I used a stopwatch, admittedly a strange way to watch porn, and some scenes I didn’t press the button once!

It can vary quite a bit depending on the genre, but most of the time there’s something (a body part or object) in the way, obscuring our view, or the shot is too wide to make out any details beyond their pubic hair style. When we, for a few fleeting seconds, do see vulva, they are naturally diverse. Long labia, short ones and barely there ones, dark and light and every shade in between. They match the complexions of those who have them, no dye or photoshop needed.

The pornographic scapegoat

So this impression that porn is making women shave or making them feel so bad about their vulva they are compelled to get labiaplastic surgery, where is this coming from? It’s coming from sources who aren’t interested in facts and evidence, as they are consumed with their own insecurities and go to great lengths to blame pornography for their problems. It’s the same group which writes things like “porn is cruel and violent” and “porn dehumanizes women and turns them into nothing more than sex objects.” This attitude begs the question: what kind of porn are these people watching?!

Anti-porn hysteria doesn’t reflect reality. It’s a delusion, whether it comes from the mouths of politicians, religious leaders or activists, and it needs to be treated as such.

Many of these rather shrill people want to see porn banned. Their minds, like cement, are all mixed up and permanently set. Their message should be ignored. A better message would be one based on facts: if you’re watching porn and see a vulva (or penis) that looks different than your own, it’s simply because everyone is unique. That uniqueness should be celebrated and appreciated.

With a background ranging from journalism, publishing and photography to computer programming and languages, along with an insatiable curiosity of the world around us, Hylton Coxwell explores a hidden topic in his first book ‘Vulva 101’. Born in 1976 near Belleville, Ontario (Canada), Hylton moved to Hiroshima, Japan in the mid- 90’s to study Japanese and various martial arts. Having returned to the Belleville area, he now teaches self-defense classes, mostly to women, and owns several small businesses. Follow Hylton on twitter @Vulva101. You can also email him at info@vulva101.com, or subscribe to his Facebook page.

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Philip Werner Talks Vaginas, Nakedness & Body Image

There's a mysterious negative stigma attached to our bodies in America. Violence and drug-use rule the airwaves, but the thought of a penis or breast being shown is revolting. Why are we so ashamed of our bodies? What happened between the time when we all walked around naked with spears? Well, not all of us are ashamed. GetLusty asked Philip Werner some questions about his book,  101 Vagina and his thoughts on how women perceive natural beauty.

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What is the premise of the 101 Vagina coffee table book project and what inspired you to create it?

The main idea is to break the taboo around vaginas and ease all the body image shame in general. I was first inspired after reading the Vagina Monologues by Eve Ensler as it really highlighted how big an issue this really is. Our entire society is hobbled by these taboos and by this shame around our bodies.

Why do you think portraying pictures of vaginas, or even mentioning them, is still so taboo?

Yes, there is a bizarre juxtaposition where on the one hand sex and bodies are sensationalized and on the other, people feel ashamed and almost afraid of the simple realities of our bodies. Bikini clad women are plastered all around us and yet some people feel uncomfortable with women breast feeding in public. Something has gone wrong somewhere and I honestly don't know how we ended up in this situation where people are afraid of the simple realities of their bodies. Perhaps vaginas are the ultimate symbol of vulnerability, openness, the feminine; all the things that the ideas of power, protection and control feel threatened by. But honestly I don't know.

How do you think nude photography and seeing other women nude can help individuals overcome shame and issues with their own bodies?

Well, I think in particular when naked bodies are depicted as they are without Photoshopping, it helps deconstruct these marketing-driven ideals that have been rammed down our throats. If you see someone who is also imperfect, just like you, you feel validated in a way. Somehow it reminds you that, yes, they are OK, and therefore I'm OK.

I was at a nude beach recently and there was a woman who had obviously had a mastectomy. One of her breasts was missing a nipple and both breasts obviously had implants. It took me aback initially, but it was also very reassuring somehow that humans are somehow perfect in their imperfections. She was comfortable, probably having come to terms with it long ago. How unfortunate that we hide our imperfections from each other all the time, no wonder so many people are depressed, trying to live up to some stupid ideals of everlasting happiness and "beauty".

Like with overly skinny models and Photoshopped, airbrushed celebrities, do you think porn puts forth the wrong image of what vaginas should look like and make women self-conscious about their own nudity? What negative side-effects have you seen related to this issue? 

Well, I think this is an interesting issue and there are many sides. "Porn," comes in so many different variations, and anyone that's had a bit of a look around will have seen many different looking vaginas. Yes, in mainstream porn most women are shaved, for example, but home made porn seems to be becoming more popular where ordinary people are just the way they are. Again the problem with porn has been that it's been market driven, rather than community driven. Look at music these days. The big marketing machines are being circumvented by everyone being able to make and upload their own music. It means people are making what they love, rather then just what the big bosses say sells records. I think ultimately the same will happen with porn, people will just make their own and the big end of town will loose it's grip.

But coming back to your question, yes, certainly anything which presents an unreal image to the world will lead people to believing that they themselves are not normal. In Australia we have the terrible situation that soft core porn mags have to airbrush vaginas into a thin slit. No labia are allowed to show. It's ludicrous. Women end up believing that they themselves are not normal and seek out plastic surgery. It's so, so sad that a teenage girl might think her vagina does not look the way it's "supposed" to look.

Besides an inaccurate representation of “normal,” what other reasons have you seen for women being ashamed of their bodies and their vaginas?

Yes, besides all the women's magazines, porn, etc? Well, there is also peer pressure isn't there. So many of the older school feminists blame men for everything, but so often the pressure to conform comes from other girls in school or other women in social circles. Most people want to fit in and be accepted and conform. But this is also where things can change. Often it only takes one person to break out from a group and say, "I'm happy with how I am and I don't think we need to all look the same" for the whole dynamic to change. And this requires courage.

How does portraying vaginas help pave the way for discussion of “taboo” topics like rape and genital mutilation?

Well, I think to a degree there is an indirect knock on effect. If someone feels more comfortable with their bodies as a result of surrounding themselves with positive messages then they will feel more empowered to talk about things. It may be easy to talk about rape or genital mutilation from an academic perspective, but it takes a lot of courage to talk about your own experience of having been violated.

So, for example, say someone has suffered some sort of abuse, or they have some difficulty with their sexuality but they have never spoken about it. Then at some point they come across a "vagina positive" book and they realize that they perhaps don't need to be so ashamed. They may, perhaps, open up to someone about their experience and that could trigger a huge healing cycle for them. Or someone has an irregularity that they ought to get checked out at the doctor but they feel embarrassed, etc. Shame prevents us from talking about things. Seeing material which unashamedly addresses that issue will help ease people's shame.

Remember also that with 101 Vagina, in particular, there is also a message that accompanies every photo. These messages are so diverse, and really it is these stories that give the book it's depth.

Who are the models for the 101 Vagina project? Was it a big step for some of them to be photographed nude and what were their reactions to their pictures?

It started with friends. However, after a few months I had only taken a few photos and I realized I needed to ramp things up. That's when I built the website and Facebook page. I invited every woman I knew in Melbourne, and then things spread from there. Before long the word got out and complete strangers came in to participate. I think the project has really struck a chord with a lot of people.

We understand you are self-publishing the book as of now and raising funds for its first print run. After the book is printed, what kind of reception do you foresee?

Oh, if only I had a crystal ball. So far people have been incredibly positive and supportive and I hope that will continue. Obviously I'd love the book to go as far as it can to have as large an impact as possible. I'd love to get on talk shows, radio shows, etc. Oprah? Ellen? I don't even know who's doing what really, I don't have a TV myself, but yes, I'd love it to go big. And the bigger the better since $5 from every book will go towards women's charities. But I understand the reality that ultimately no one cared about your project as much as you do. Never mind, if I only sell 100 copies so be it. In a way the project has already been successful because it has already touched a lot of people's lives.

Where can our readers go to learn more and how can they support the project?

Please visit the crowdfunding page to support the project here: http://pozible.com/101vagina.

In addition to the 101 Vagina project, you’re also selling a vagina calendar to raise funds for the One Billion Rising event protesting violence against women. Tell us more about it. How did you get involved, and how does this event’s message relate to 101 Vagina’s goal of erasing the taboo surrounding women’s bodies?

Yes, it's an interesting union and one that some people may find a bit jarring, but I really believe that we need to take an unflinching look at the causes of sexual abuse rather than simply lament and be outraged at it's occurrence. I strongly believe that sexual repression and sexual aggression/abuse are connected. I just don't think that anyone who is truly comfortable in their sexuality would ever impose themselves on another person. Rape and abuse are NOT expressions of sexual freedom, but of sexual repression. And sexual repression is closely related to body image shame and taboos.

One Billion Rising is a V-Day event, and V-day was founded by Eve Ensler who wrote The Vagina Monologues, so it's already a natural fit. I got involved because I already knew about V-day and One Billion Rising, and when some friends of mine started planing to organize an event in Melbourne I jumped on board. Regarding the calendar, well I figured that the media often like controversial calendars that are raising money for good causes, so this might be a way to raise the funds needed to stage the event in the most visible place in Melbourne. It's not cheap, we've got to come up with $20,000 and are also looking for corporate sponsors. We can be contacted at: onebillionrisingmelbourne@gmail.com.

Philip Werner is a Melbourne (Australia) based photographer (philipwernerfoto.com), web-designer, mediator, furniture maker (lazydeckchairs.com.au), thinker, engineer, shit-stirrer and perhaps soon-to-be book publisher (101vagina.com).

He has traveled the external and internal world extensively and gotten a closer understanding of each in the process. His photographic portrait work demonstrates this awareness through the depth of presence he captures in his subjects, bringing their internal world to light in the external form of their bodies. Follow him on Twitter & Facebook.

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Vulvas & Porn: Why Their Relationship 'Is Complicated' (NSFW) (Part 1)

At GetLusty, we feel like porn can be beautiful. Feminist porn that is. What about mainstream 'traditional' porn? At GetLusty, we like to talk about erotica of all kinds. We've touched on the potential negative affects of too much porn for men. but now we want to take a look at how porn might be skewing the perceptions of women. We're glad to have the perspective of Hylton Coxwell, author of Vulva 101. The first in a two part series, Hylton defends the porn industry against what he calls "quasi-feminist" blogs.

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It’s porn’s fault! 

At least that what we’re often told. Whether about corrupting morality, or the more recent hot topics of pubic hair removal and labiaplasty, the notion that pornography has the ability to manipulate human behavior has been assumed to be the truth. But is this really the case—can it actually compel people to shave daily or have parts of their genitals surgically removed?

Though I’ve read it in medical literature, today quasi-feminist blogs are the biggest pushers of that idea. I say ‘quasi’ as there’s a big difference between believing women have sole control over their bodies, choices and sexuality, versus simply being angry with individual men. The latter also presume women are gullible and easily manipulated, by those evil male pornographers, into doing things like shaving their pubic hair or having parts of their labia removed.

Here’s a few direct quotes:

“Sometimes they are influenced in these views by having seen misleading pornographic magazines or videos – in which the ‘heroine’s’ vulva appears impossibly neat and tidy!” “Often times the only point of reference women have is what they see in porn. And what they see is dyed, shaved, airbrushed and sometimes surgically altered. What they see does not occur naturally.”

That sounds good on the surface, except it’s not true. That’s not what you see in porn, and is so far from reality I must question whether the authors of those statements have ever actually viewed porn. It’s not based on evidence. They just made all that up, or repeated something someone else made up.

Don’t believe me? 

Just google the words ‘vulva’ or ‘pussy’ or any of the other common slang terms and what you’ll find is a real cross-section of how vulva actually look. You’ll likely end up on thumbnail gallery posts (pages of small images which when clicked view the full-sized pictures). And probably, you'll encounter more than a few blind links. But you’ll see long lips (labia minora), short ones and barely there ones, shaved, trimmed, hairy and a respectably wide range of body types and ages.

In essence, you’ll find the same range of vulva appearance, labia size and pubic hair in porn as you do in the general population. While researching for this article, I viewed thousands of random vulva images, and not a single vulva would be out-of-place in Vulva 101. All were naturally occurring—not one was dyed, Photoshopped or manipulated to alter the shape, size or color of labia. The only ones I found that were surgically altered were those of transgender women.

It’s important to note: virtually every image you see (of any subject, in print and online) has been “Photoshopped” to some degree, mainly to ensure the image looks good color-wise on-screen or on various combinations of ink and paper types. I spent more than a decade Photoshopping hundreds of thousands of images, and ‘darkrooming’ them before that, in my career so doctored images are pretty easy to spot. If there are misleading vulva images in pornography, I’m having a seriously difficult time finding any.

Pornography is not a manipulator, it’s simply a mirror of what exists. There’s no agenda, no one is trying deceive you as to what vulva actually look like.

Illegal vulva

No one at least, except for some governments. There are countries with strict laws prohibiting the sale of images showing vulva (and penises too). Japan, for instance, forces porn producers to blur out vulva entirely and Australia requires on-the-shelf erotic magazines to not show any inner lips. Producers comply, not because they want to or because they think lips are obscene—in fact they hate the laws and the expense incurred by all that retouching—but because they have to in order to sell their products.

Prepubescent myth

Another argument often thrown around regarding the lack of pubic hair in porn is that it makes women look like little girls, and men want women to look prepubescent. This concept is as absurd as it is insulting. It ignores the fact that adult, shaved vulva don’t look like those of little girls and it totally disregards women’s motivation for shaving, and their right to do so.

While working on Vulva 101, I spoke with hundreds of women about this. When asked why they chose to remove some or all of their pubic hair the answer was a resounding, “I like the way it feels, and it’s easier to keep clean.” Coincidentally, these are some of the same reasons humans have been removing pubic hair for thousand of years.

Vulva Puppets

And then there’s the Vulva Puppet, and other abstractly colored vulva trinkets, sometimes regarded as the antithesis to the “unnatural” images of vulva in “male-centric” porn. Well-meaning as they may be, as teaching tools they are worse than useless and border on the comically ridiculous. They only serve to illustrate what real vulva don’t look like and sadly reinforce the perception that actual vulva are too graphic or obscene to be viewed.

So where do people get the idea that porn causes women to believe they must shave their pubic hair, or that their labia are too long and need to be surgically removed? They certainly don’t get the idea from viewing porn, that much is clear. Instead the idea comes from not viewing porn. It’s an idea based not on fact but on ignorance and fear.

It’s a lie, often repeated and easily believed. In Part 2, we delve deeper into the subject of porn and vulvas. Our two favorite topics.

With a background ranging from journalism, publishing and photography to computer programming and languages, along with an insatiable curiosity of the world around us, Hylton Coxwell explores a hidden topic in his first book ‘Vulva 101’. Born in 1976 near Belleville, Ontario (Canada), Hylton moved to Hiroshima, Japan in the mid- 90’s to study Japanese and various martial arts. Having returned to the Belleville area, he now teaches self-defense classes, mostly to women, and owns several small businesses. Follow Hylton on twitter @Vulva101. You can also email him at info@vulva101.com, or subscribe to his Facebook page.

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Vulva 101: a Book That's an Ode to the Vulva (NSFW)

We're all about educating about the vulva. Coincidentally, after receiving publishing our Vulva 101: 6 Tips for Success article, the wonderful and lovely Hylton Coxwell reached out to send us a copy of "Vulva 101" in the mail.

The moment we read through it, we loved it to say the least! The book is sitting in the middle of our office on a coffee table. We recommend it to many of the ladies and gents who pass through our four walls!

Vulvas, vaginas, inner lips and just the entire 'down there' is beautiful. As ladies, unless we partake in cunnilingus, we don't have much of an opportunity to see the vulva with all its glory. Dr. Carlen, of the Sexy Living blog, is here to take a moment to reflect on why she loves "Vulva 101," the new book by Hylton Coxwell.

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My vulva is a delicate flower

My vulva is a work of art

My vulva likes to play

My vulva likes to part

My vulva relieves my stress

My vulva gives me a glow

My vulva is my best friend

Even when it flows.

Ok, so I’m not the best poet this century but the point was that I recently discovered a term that I think many of my readers will thoroughly enjoy. I was watching a tv show last night, aimed mostly at a heterosexual male audience, and this term came up:

I recently received Vulva 101 by Hylton Coxwell in the mail. I’ll admit, even for a Sexologist, looking at a book vibrant with pictures of vulvas can be a really eye-opening experience. I have Vaginal Hubris. I take pride in my vaginal strength, size, colour and shape. I take care of my vulva. I tidy it up, I do my kegels and treat it as part of my physiological temple.

Think about it, though. If you don’t take pride in your vulva, how do you expect anyone else to worship it? As I begin, and open the book, the dedication is where I stop and take a moment to reflect. It reads: “This book is dedicated to all those who have ever felt shame regarding their bodies and to those who see beauty in all things.”

What is beauty? In a world where social commodification is in every commercial, magazine and ad as well as the strong rules of performativity that continue to thrive based on the binary of patriarchal systemics it’s no wonder we can’t even define the purity of beauty. This though, is what Vulva 101 is all about.

"Finally! It’s about time someone made the connection between the academic, anatomical medical diagrams to the 'up close' and personally intimate visual presence of a women’s geinitalia; a specific focus on the uniqueness of each women’s vulva." - Viktoria Kalenteris

This informative and visual anomalie is exactly what is being said. It is about looking. It is about provocation. It is about shifting the discourse from normal & abnormal to healthy & harm reductive. Vulva 101 has 5 chapters, each uniquely exploring our current relationship that many of us have with our vulvas. Throughout the pages though are vibrant and eye catching pictoral debuts of a large variety of beautiful vulvas. All are different, unique and the collection reminds me of my mothers' garden from my youth. Growing, changing and beautiful.

According to Hylton, our vulva should be seen as “A part that should symbolize life, love and pleasure, but instead is hidden from society and individuals, even from their words and thoughts,” (page 11). This is what our vulva culture has become. When it’s easier to say penis & testicles, than it is vulva, vagina or clitoris.

I remember in my undergrad being with a large group of friends and playing “the penis game”. As irrelevant as it may sound, the goal of the game was to be the person who could yell the word penis as loud as possible in gradual increments. We never played this game with the word vagina. Maybe the 3 syllables was too difficult of a task at the time.

The one piece that makes Vulva 101 different from other literary or artistic pieces about the vulva is in its display. Hylton made it quite clear that the graphic and full featured colourful pictures are on purpose and part of the attempt to evoke dialogue. Being that it was already difficult to find similar reference to what was being attempted through Vulva 101, Hylton found that any similar projects often “tried to water everything down, often in sepia tones or black and white, in an effort to not be confused with pornography."

Why is it every time we see or elude to our genitalia it is either medicalized or negatively socialized in reference to ‘that dirty pornography’? Our own bodies, our temples, our selves have become our own worst enemies of the state-literally and figuratively speaking. We find solace in protecting our prized treasures and are reacted with retribution when we attempt to go beyond our concealment and choose to publicly celebrate what is one of our most effective ways to connect with nature and our heritage.

“So who are the 101 women who posed? Women from all walks of life, body types and ages (18-65, with an average age of 34)” (page 13). Vulva 101 visually explores and celebrates the vulva of every woman, no matter what they called it. “Pussy, vagina, cunt, down there, vajayjay, cookie, box, punani, fanny (British), whowho, who-ha, junk, package, it, cooch, cooter, cunny, snatch, kitty, chatte (French), vagin (French), truffle, kitten, minage, muff, quim, twat, clam, beef-curtains, giggy, Center of the Universe, Petunia, George and jinka (Japanese) [these are listed] in order of popularity among the women who posed” (page 15). This is the language. These are the words that manipulate our ideals of the vulva. No matter what word you identify with though, all are understood as a reference to our most beautiful of parts-the vulva.

I wouldn’t want to ruin your own experience of indulging in Vulva 101, which is why I will end my review here. I feel that the ultimate goal of Vulva 101 is all about revealing normativity in the abnormal manifestation of our vaginal discourse. It goes beyond the experience of our knowing, our cultural relativity and urges your own manifestation of understanding the relationship we all have; self-identified woman or self indentified men to arise, page by page with the vulva.

Therefore, consider adding Vulva 101 to your collections. Or, if you are not in a place where you cannot, consider then, adding love to your relationship with one of the most precious temples in existence, the vulva. Vulva 101 is also on Twitter @vulva101.

Originally posted on Dr. Carlen's Sexy Living Tumblr.

Dr. Carlen Costa is pretty awesome. A resident of London, Ontario in Canada, she's making waves in London and beyond.

As a Sexologist, "Sexy Living with Dr. Carlen" is the creation of a safe space in order to discuss concerns, desires or general questions in regards to your relationship with your partner, yourself, and others. Send me questions, send me your thoughts! Through this we will cater to all orientations, genders and age groups. We are all Sexy beings, and should feel as such in our own skins. Find Dr. Carlen on Twitter @DrCarlen and 'Like' her Facebook page.

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Ladies! Are You Reaching Your Orgasm Potential?

It's Orgasm October. Every female should be able to experience orgasms throughout her life. Not only do orgasms give us an amazing feeling, but they are also healthy! Yet, we still hear about women not reaching their orgasm potential or have never even experienced the magic that is an orgasm. But why is this? Devi Ward, an international authentic tantra educator and sensual empowerment coach, has a few reasons for this. Start reaching your orgasm potential today with a little help from Devi!

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Set goals to reach your orgasm potential

There’s a lot of talk these days about women & orgasm: 8 different kinds vs. none. Questions like: is it easy, is it difficult, should we focus on it, or not put so much pressure on ourselves for the “end goal” of climax.

I and GetLusty encourage women to explore their multi-orgasmic potential, and discover the more than 8 different kinds of orgasm our bodies are capable of. For examples, there are 3 kinds of orgasms and 3 more kinds of orgasms for ladies. Some people say that this “goal oriented” approach to sexuality causes women to feel inadequate. Then, they aren’t able to achieve those results, as it sets them up for failure, disappointment and a lifetime of sexual dissatisfaction.

Well that’s one point of view. Here’s mine:

Imagine that you have in your hands the most technologically advanced computer on the planet, capable of mathematically calibrating dimensional portals into other realms of existence.

With the potential to open the entire human race to universal awareness & connection with higher states of consciousness. Now imagine that you had no idea that your computer was capable of such a thing. You thought it was just an ordinary Mac or PC, and just like everybody else, had been operating it as such. Operating at maybe 10% of it’s actual potential.

Next, imagine that you encountered someone who had used this particular computer before, and knew it’s true capabilities. This person could see that you had no idea the potential of what you held in your hands. This person had also mistaken this technologically advanced vehicle for a mere laptop, at one time, but had learned it’s true abilities, and discovered how to maximize it’s potential.

And what if this person said to you- “Hey, do you know what you have in your hands?! Oh my god! You can transform life as you know it with that device. That machine is the key to the kingdom of heaven, not just for yourself, but for all of humankind!

All you need to do to access it’s full potential is:

a) Understand what it’s capable of.
b) Understand why it hasn’t been operating at its optimum level.
c) Slowly and carefully tune it up; recalibrate it.

Add an app here, do a virus scan there, work out the kinks and you’ll be flying high! Wouldn’t you want to know that? Wouldn’t you want to know if your operating system was running on only 10% of it’s full potential? Wouldn’t you want to find out WHY that was happening and change it if you could, so that you were running at 100% of your capacity, or at least moving in that direction? I say all of this because I was one of those non-orgasmic, inadequate feeling, sexually repressed, “average” women.

I talk about the eight different orgasms for women because I personally experience them. I went from one standard clitoral orgasm during self-stimulation to multi-orgasmic. Also, no orgasms with my partners, painful penetration, and a complete inability to communicate about my sexuality. To now being regularly multi-orgasmic, fully and lovingly expressive about my sexuality, and emotionally, spiritually & mentally free in ways I never even knew existed.

Have I realized my ultimate potential? Nope. Not even close. And that is what is so exciting! I have amazing tools, and I use them, and I continue to grow & expand beyond my current personal & sexual boundaries.

I continue to awaken to even more of my personal orgasmic potential as a woman. I celebrate this loudly because I believe that every woman has a right to know what her true sexual potential is, and have ways to access and explore that potential everyday. I believe that it is our birthright as women to understand the full pleasure potential of our bodies and have healthy role models who have begun to realize and embody this. Now as a woman, I ask you, does that make you feel inadequate?

Originally posted at Authentic Tantra.

Devi Ward is an International Authentic Tantra Educator & Sensual Empowerment Coach. Devi has been on a path of Erotic Awakening and Spiritual Embodiment since 1993, studying meditation, holistic healing arts, and alternative forms of erotic expression. Devi has been a Professional Sensual Movement Artist since 1992.

Devi is the Founder of Feminine Emergence and creator of Sacred Erotic Dance™; a Movement-Healing modality that uses The 5 Core Pelvic Movements™, Authentic Tantra™ & Sensual Dance, to produce physical, emotional and spiritual healing in our relationship to sexual and sensual self-expression. Her new book “Shake Your Soul Song! A Woman’s Guide To Self-Empowerment Through The Art of Self-Pleasure” will release in October 2012. Follow Devi on Twitter @deviwardtantra and on Facebook.

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