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Do Men Fake Orgasms?

Do men fake orgasms? The stereotype is that men (young men especially) can come whenever and wherever they want. But what about those time when an orgasm just will not come? Be it too much alcohol, the side effect of medication, or just plain stress, there are times when even men experience the frustration all women are familiar with: sometimes an orgasm is just not going to happen. When this happens do men fake orgasms or just simply stop having sex? Our newest featured writer, Georgia Knapp, is here to talk about men. Do they fake orgasms? How can we deal with it instead of ignoring it for a better sexual relationship? Read on!

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Is it even possible for a man to fake an orgasm? In short: yes. Men do fake orgasms. A 2010 survey issued by revealed that 30% of male readers had faked an orgasm. When performing a Google search on “do men fake orgasms?” a How To article was found, instructing men on the perfect way to fake their orgasmic finish (note: it is more believable when wearing a condom).

When interviewing male friends, nearly all said that they had “definitely” faked an orgasm with their partner. The one who said he never faked an orgasm stated that when he could not ejaculate he just admitted this to his partner – as long as the woman was happy, he was happy! Although the reasons for each delayed ejaculation (DE) varies from man to man, the reason for each fake out remains constant: to not wound their partner’s pride. The frequency of fake ejaculations in relationships vs casual hook-ups seems to be split down the middle. Some men said that they feel more pressure to please their girlfriend/wife and therefore have faked an orgasm many times so that their partner, “does not feel like she did anything wrong.” Other guys stated that they have pretended to come more often with a casual hook-up because they, “don’t care as much.”

So is it the lack of attraction or emotional connection to one’s partner that inhibits men from ejaculating? The general consensus is ‘no’. Instead it is the frequency of sex in a single day, stress, and alcohol that has a greater effect. One man even stated, “Even if the sex is awful, you can still come.”

An orgasm is the “sudden discharge of accumulated sexual tension...resulting in rhythmic muscular contractions in the pelvic region characterized by an intense sensation of pleasure.” It is a part of the autonomic nervous system (or visceral/involuntary nervous system), which functions primarily below the level of consciousness. In short, the inability to orgasm is the old “it’s not you, it’s me” excuse, but for real. Although anorgasmia (the inability to have an orgasm) is significantly more common in women than in men, doctors have noticed an increase in DE over the past several years. Much of this is can be related to stress from the economy, unemployment rates, and the increase of porn. DE can also be the result of medication or poor health.

So which is worse: for a man to fake an orgasm or a woman? Society teaches us that men can ejaculate so easily that for them to not have an orgasm during sex must mean something is drastically wrong. The reality is, it’s not that big of a deal. Sometimes men just cannot come no matter how much they may want to. This is not a reaction to the quality of the sex, partner, or the relationship. Sometimes, just like with women, a man’s visceral nervous system just says, “Sorry, buddy, not tonight.”

Our next articles will cover more areas on why you shouldn't fake orgasm, ladies and gents. We'll also cover what to do when you learn they've faked it. How do you talk about your orgasm in an open environment? Suffice to say, we recommend talking before, during and after sex. Communication is key for successful sexual relationships.

Stay in love, stay in touch!

Georgia Laso is another awesome writer from GetLusty for Couples. Georgia is a Southern lady whose sweet demeanor helps people open up to her about all their sexual escapades, fantasies, and charades. She is a self-proclaimed theatre nerd and is excited to talk to anybody and everybody about all that Chicago’s theater scene has to offer. A recent graduate from a small Liberal Arts college, Georgia is thrilled to be one of the latest members added to GetLusty for Couples’s team!

Want to get in touch with her? Get in touch with her at
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