This article is by our UK-based contributor, Sara Albaladejo.
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Girls, we may be doing it wrong! Have you ever seen that weird look in your man’s eyes after performing your sexiest move? Was that a groan of pleasure or is he just too polite to tell you that it hurts? Carrying on with our series of things you shouldn’t do in bed, this time we are focusing on what we, women, should avoid doing.
Before sex
Problem #1: hairy, messy bush Are you sexy and you know it but too exhausted to show it? Sometimes you can’t be asked to go through the whole process of grooming: waxing, plucking, choosing sexy underwear. While it's true that many man don't really care about your panties--or even your bush--it's a great idea to maintain a good sense of hygiene so he can lick and suck everywhere.
Remedy: Pamper yourself & trim
Take it as the baking before eating the cake. Get ready thinking all you are doing will be rewarded later on. While you're trimming down there, why not pour yourself a glass of wine? Maybe not three--you're handing your precious bits. But one glass of wine and a nice bath, it'll be like a mini holiday! Also, it can be a good opportunity to pamper yourself and rediscover those parts of that amazing body you forgot.
Tip: Trim that bush. And I don't mean just what is down there, we have also a behind we can enjoy that may need some mowing. Although the act of having your anus kissed is called “the dark kiss”, it doesn't mean that you should keep your butt in darkness. We have already discussed the advantages of trimming (and or shaving or waxing, if you're so adventurous), so next time you are grooming your pubic hair, how about going a bit further?
Side note: Douching is completely unnecessary and potentially harmful according to Planned Parenthood, so we recommend against it.
During sex
Problem #2 Quietness
Have you ever felt embarrassed of your voice during sex? Yeah, I've been there, too.
On the other side, how about the moment we hear our lover groan and moan in the heat of the moment? We all love to hear the moan coming out the mouth of the man we are pleasing. They love it too.
Remedy: Moan
It is proved that moaning and controlling our breathing increases the pleasure of the orgasm and letting your partner know how much you are enjoying his thrusting is a sexy reward. Let yourself go, groan and scream if you like. Telling your man what you want is an effective way to improve your sex life and it comes in handy when he does that thing that makes your head spin around.
Problem #3: Telling him what you want
The trouble is when they don’t seem to find the right spot and you start giving directions as if you were in the car holding a map upside-down. It is frustrating and he probably will give up at the second time you say “More to your right. No, not like that. Keep going to your right.”
Remedy: Show him
Subtly swing your hips towards the point you want him to find. In case he is still flying blind gently take his hand and move it to where you want. Feeling wild? Do it yourself in front of him, he would probably love the view!
Problem #4: Surprise!?
Not satisfied yet? You may want to have a look at some different ideas to surprise your hubby the next time you warm the sheets, but be careful. Because that article you read on your way home says you should try dripping hot wax on your boobs (and it swears he’ll love it), it may not be the best idea.
Remedy: Just ask
Don't be gullible. Get your ideas from specialized sources (like GetLusty of course) and ask your lover if you aren’t sure. Does he like to get spanked? Dominated or dominate you? Talk about it first and open up the conversation on ending your boring sex. It's totally OK to admit your sex is getting somewhat usual (which is totally normal for married & long-term partners).
Problem #5: Surprising him with new toys
Do you have toys? I bet you wouldn’t mind him to be part of your games, but suddenly taking out of your drawer your set of beads and your dildo isn’t going to make him clap in excitement.
Just the fact that you have toys can be an issue. Your partner may see it as a threat to their masculinity instead of a chance to spice up the relationship.
Remedy: Again, just ask
Your man enjoys a good surprise. And hopefully, he'll want to end your boring sex session as much as you do. Either way, you can't move forward until you get your voice heard. Again, ask your partner and discuss it beforehand. That way you will make sure that both of you are enjoying the experience.
Pic #1 Thanks to memegenerator. Pic #3 Njoy dildo thanks to PinkCherry!
Sara is our resident, sexy British-Spanish writer. After finishing high school she followed the family tradition of becoming a teacher, and graduated as a Foreign Language Primary Teacher in 2011. Since then she has been living in the UK, where she copes with the British weather with her loving boyfriend. She is passionate about writing and was awarded various contests in Spain (where she was born) and has also been recognized one of the best writers of her age in her region in 2010. She loves taking her camera out whenever she can, as photography is another of her hobbies.
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